![]() Or, you will avoid all love and connection in order to be ‘safe’, but instead lead your life in a state of constant loneliness and depression. Even if a partner is not physically violent, they might constantly criticise you, or refuse you any real emotional support. You are likely to also choose relationships that are ‘dangerous’. These hidden beliefs you mistake for fact will be buried in your unconscious but driving all your decisions and behaviours.įor example, if you grew up with one parent controlling and threatening the other, you will have the core belief that love is unsafe. Growing up with no healthy relationship role models creates a set of unconscious assumptions about yourself, others and the world are called ‘ core beliefs‘ in psychology. You own a set of core beliefs that keep connection at bay. Instead you are likely to have unhealthy ideas around relating that actually encourage you to choose badly or push people away, or Hollywood-movie expectations that mean you can’t recognise real love. If you grew up in a home with, say, parents who hated each other and were constantly fighting or cheating, or a single parent who was scared of relationships, you just won’t have any inbuilt understanding of relationships. If you want a good relationship but have never really seen one up close and in action, then how would you recognise it if it was standing right in front of you? You have unhealthy programming around what a relationship actually is. 7 Psychological reasons you can’t find a good relationship 1. *Of course there is no law that says everyone must be in a relationship! But the issues below will also be the same ones making relating with colleagues, friends, and family hard, too. ![]() ![]() It means you are past the stage of making yourself a victim and blaming everyone you date, or telling yourself the disempowering fib that ‘you just haven’t found the right one’ yet. Recognising the issue might stem from you is a powerful first step. The accusations against Senator Al Franken (Democratic-Minnesota) perhaps prove this point best: When he allegedly groped television anchor Leeann Tweeden’s breasts, there was someone around to take a photo.Frustrated by your inability to attract a healthy relationship? And plain tired of being alone? Sexual misconduct happens in many different contexts - not just late at night in hotel rooms or in one-on-one meetings with superiors. “This includes any aspect of the relationship between employer and employees -extending to benefits like equal access to the employer,” Grossman added. She explained that women are protected against this kind of workplace discrimination by Title VII, which rules that employers “cannot set the terms and conditions of employment differently for one gender than for the other.” ![]() “Employers are also not permitted to base employment decisions on gender-based stereotypes - including the stereotype that women are temptresses, or incapable of having purely professional relationships with male bosses or co-workers,” Joanna Grossman, a sex discrimination lawyer, wrote in Vox in March. Women must continue to lose out on promotions, miss out on the chummy happy hours their male colleagues have long enjoyed and fade into the background, all in the name of safeguarding themselves against sexual misconduct men can find no better way to prevent.Īnd this kind of exclusionary behaviour isn’t just unsavory it can be illegal. This kind of blanket policy suggests it’s women who must pay for men’s transgressions.
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